Twilight, Part Two

Well. I finished reading all 498 pages of Twilight.

Yeah.

I've already spent one post talking about this book. I'll try not to repeat myself. I'll also try not to be too harsh, as I am aware some people love these books. I... do not.

Two hundred pages in, I was willing to give it the benefit of the doubt. It is, after all, a debut novel. Those can be rough. Everyone starts somewhere, right?

Right.

I have read the debut novels for Andre Norton, Mercedes Lackey, Tanya Huff, Amelia Atwater-Rhodes, and several others. And they are... rough. But good. Good stories, good characters, good writing. In every one, there is something to show the reader that there is a reason to put up with the rough spots. There is a reason to pick up this author's next work. Not with this novel. Honestly, if I was not making an effort to be fair and not hypocritical I'd have stopped reading somewhere around the first three chapters. There is NOTHING in this book that makes me want to read the next one, let alone all four.

Okay. I'm going to calm down now, and rationally explain my disdain for this book.

I could go on for pages about how boring Bella is. But I won't. I understand that Bella is a cardboard cut-out designed to be replaced in the imaginations of pre-teen girls by, well, themselves. I get that. I admit I spent a fair amount of time envisioning myself in her place, discovering what happens when you kick a sparkling vampire in the man-bits.

I will take a moment to say I absolutely abhor passive main characters. Just because a character is blank doesn't mean they have to be passive. Look at Dears, Chobits, Love Hina... pretty much any "harem" style anime. The main guy is generally boring and average and replaceable. He is not usually PASSIVE.

I think I hinted at my dislike for Edward. Moving on.

No, I'm going to focus on Twilight from a storytelling perspective. Because frankly, I am only the latest in a long, long list of reviewers who've expressed dislike for the main characters.

As I was taught in every writing class I ever took, there are three elements to a story: plot, character, and setting. There are other things, of course, but these three are ALWAYS important. So how does Twilight fare in these three fields?

I like to start with the positive, so I'll start with setting.

Twilight has beautiful setting descriptions. This is, honestly, where the book shines. Even when Bella is describing something she despises, which would be the entire town apparently, she does it in a nearly poetic fashion that makes it possible for the reader to almost see what the character sees. That's great. I wish I could do it.

The forests, the school, Bella's childhood home and the house she shares with her father are all lovingly depicted. The description of the meadow where Edward reveals the reason vampires do not go out in sunlight is worth a read, even two.

I could do with a few LESS descriptions of how beautiful Edward is... especially the eyes... but I do understand that this is a romance. Even so. I got it 200 pages in, after 498 I was ready to poke something in the eye if I had to read one more description of his.

Moving on. To the PLOT!

It had a plot?

Okay, that was catty and I apologize.

The basic elements ARE there. There's an introduction, wherein Bella describes herself, her situation, her town, and of course, Edward's eyes. Then there's some build up, with a few decent scenes. Then there's the, ah, climax... which I guess has to be where Bella confronts the rather underwhelming villain of the book because the final climatic battle is NEVER SEEN. I felt cheated, honestly. Yes, I understand that Bella was somewhat unconscious, and the book WAS in first person... but still. There were ways the author could have managed that confrontation with Bella conscious. We spend 470 some odd pages hearing how dangerous and powerful these vampires are supposed to be... but we never once see it. Yes, we have the "bad" vampire, whose goal of murdering Bella I fully sympathize with, but his attack on the girl is nothing an adult human with sufficient training couldn't accomplish.

So, the plot lacks a true, vivid climax. Well, mostly. I guess as a fan of action I just feel cheated of the big fight. That's fine. Every book doesn't have to end with an epic battle.

I think my main complaint with the plot is the pacing. Things that I felt could have been lingered over, such as Bella's interactions with Edward's "family" are skimmed over in a handful of pages. Things that did not feel all that important were lingered over far too long. Edward's eyes come to mind. Also the love... um... triangle? Involving Bella, the perfectly decent guys at her school who want to get to know her, and the vampire. It was a foregone conclusion she's pick tall dark and brooding, so why was there so much attention paid to it?

Now for character. Hold on to your hats, this may be brutal.

The protagonist: Bella Swan. Boring, passive, empty headed and clumsy. I am only sorry that we don't get to see her as the world's clumsiest Nosferatu, because that'd be hilarious. Imagine her tripping over her own feet at the speeds these vampires are capable of running and try not to smile. I dare you.
The male lead: Edward Cullen. Well. He's apparently very pretty and very dangerous, but we get absolutely no proof of the second and far, far too much proof of the first. He comes off as a jerk to me. But then I like my guys with a sense of humor and a pulse.
The villain: James? Honestly, while the idea of a vampire with tracking powers is nicely chilling, the villain himself is just underwhelming. He's a set piece, yet another threat for Edward to daringly rescue Bella from.
The rest of the cast: There's some good ones here. I'd have liked to read more about Alice, the precognitive vampire. Hey, a blood-sucker who can see the future? Now THAT is dangerous. The "father" of the vampire family seems kind of interesting, too. I mean, how many times has he gone through medical school? How did he handle going from a witch-hunter's son to being one of the undead? These characters are sadly underdeveloped. I'll give Stephenie Meyers credit, though. It's entirely plausible that the side characters are expanded upon in the three later novels. I won't be reading them to find out.

So, in summary, how does Twilight hold up to the writer's trinity? Not so well. Setting? Great. It's a vivid, believable world where sparkly (snerk) vampires walk among normal people. Okay. Plot? Not so much. The pacing is off kilter and the climax is disappointing. Characters? Don't get me started. I don't think I can get past the two dimensional blank space that is the point of view character. You're supposed to be able to SYMPATHIZE with the main character, usually.

There is one more thing I'd like to rant about. I'm not really sure if anyone else even noticed this line, and I might be reading it out of context intended and if so I apologize. Well, no, I don't because this is my opinion.

After Bella is made to understand that the vampire James has decided to stalk and kill her, she reasonably enough asks "Why? Why me?". This is the question ANYONE would ask in that situation I think. Well, that or "So do crosses and garlic work? How about stakes?" But anyway.

What is our intrepid and beautiful Edward's response?

I quote: "It is partially your fault.' His voice was wry. 'If you didn't smell so appallingly luscious, he might not have bothered." (Stephanie Meyers, Twilight).

Wow.

Just wow.

I am sorry, but I could not forgive that line. I couldn't. To imply, even "wryly", that the victim of ANY kind of physical assault or the threat thereof somehow DESERVED it is... appalling.

This is the kind of attitude that blames a woman for being raped. "Well she was dressed provocatively." "Well she was so beautiful." "Well she led him on."

That it was a WOMAN who wrote that line, KNOWING that young girls would read it... I don't have words.
Writers, even the writers of fantasy, have the responsibility to THINK about what we are saying. Because, as Leonardo DiCaprio's character in Inception put so well, the most dangerous thing in the world is an idea. It is impossible to kill an idea. And it makes me mildly sick to think that so many little girls now have THAT idea somewhere deep in their minds.

Well, that's it for my review of Twilight.
Thank you for your patience in reading this. I hope I entertained you at least a little. That is, after all, what I'm here to do.
Next time, I'll put up a review of a book I ENJOY, so that you can see the difference. I may even reread Dragon Bones for a palate cleanser.